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Terrific Teaching Tips, Issue #040-- June 2013 Ezine
June 01, 2013
As the saying goes "Time flies when you're having fun!" Is that how you feel at this time of the year? I can't believe that I'm writing the June newsletter.
I have always been the type of person who has always been thrilled for other peoples' successes, accomplishments, achievements, hopes and dreams. I have thrived to instill this in my own children as well as my students each year that I taught. (However the latter can be a challenging endeavour depending on the situation).
Success is a wonderful high and should be savoured and the majority of us have no difficulty enjoying our own success.
However, throughout my personal and more so my professional life I have observed and experienced jealousy arise over other peoples' or my own successes and that creates a whole different ballgame. A staff member or friend may feel it was just luck, may want to deprive the person of their just rewards or try one upmanship with a bigger accomplishment. They see the person as a rival which could definitely affect the enjoyment of the person's success(es).
This is the theme of June's newsletter - what are the steps of enjoying other peoples' successes and how to instill them in our students (hopefully). Remember, you never want to compromise your own integrity.
First of all, you need to acknowledge and express your approval of someone else's success. They worked hard in achieving their success and deserve to enjoy it. You, as a teacher, know and acknowledge this each and every day.
Secondly, in enjoying others' success is to promote the achievement. If you haven't done so as yet, you have to learn to appreciate and value the person's efforts and accomplishments. You will then be able to release the build up tensions/jealousy when you feel guilty when you can't enjoy their achievements. As a teacher, creating and nurturing success should be a given. If not, it can stifle your growth.
A third step, is to ask for details and inquire about the success. Display your interest. This can be a learning curve for yourself as well.
Another step to consider is to believe that a person's success was not because of sheer luck or knowing the "right" person or being at the right place at the right time.
Are you familiar with the saying "it's not what you know, it's who you know". That may be true in some cases, however, a person needs to be capable to make that success happen.
Finally, we may have to take a reality check. It's funny (not really) when someone fails or experiences a loss, we are there quickly to exhibit sympathy. But we abandon or ignore them when they achieve success because we can't handle it.
When this happens, they may start to build walls. They learn pretty fast who they can share their enjoyment with and who they can't. You may even see this in your family or in your friends' families. If family members can't enjoy that person's success, they may pull away and not share their personal or professional achievements. Relationships will definitely fall apart and may never rekindle.
Do you agree that that is an excellent reason to respond positively to whatever the accomplishment is? Keep in mind to take care of your reputation. It's one of your most valuable assets.
If we don't take part in our staff members' or friends' successes, we may lose out. You also may not want to be known as a killjoy. We should want to share in their enjoyment and exhilaration, which can be a starting point to our own successes and potential opportunities. Don't forget that a person's greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.
You know that there are some people who can handle success beautifully, while others can't or won't. Experiencing success is crucial for one's happiness and healthy self-worth. Of course, exhibiting success must be done gracefully and not thrown in anyone's face by flaunting it.
If you want to experience your own successes, you must learn to comprehend, appreciate and acknowledge all successful endeavours.
You may want or need to apply some of these steps yourself. But for sure, teach them to your students. Be an excellent role model. When you learn to recognize other peoples' successes, you will be overjoyed when others express their happiness towards your achievements. Wouldn't the world be a much better place?
"The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves". - William Penn.
Fellow teachers, you are going to have a busy, hectic but exhilarating month of June. Enjoy the last hurrah with your students!!!
Whatever you are doing, whether it's taking a course, getting married, having a baby, vacationing with family/friends, etc., be happy, healthy and enjoy yourself.
Talk to you in September.
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